headlight

//Friday, August 27, 2010 9:53 PM

Compartments.

Too many aspects. Different faces?

And sometimes it's like colliding into a glass ceiling.

We box each other up, all the time. Our world is large a self-referenced one, perceived from what we see, and what we think we know. No one's just that. I'm not just that.

And like Hedda, sometimes even if we actually try, it's also up to whether the world lets us.

It's been existing as separate entities for too long that it's become awkward even, to integrate it, to show, to reveal, to each or either.

Awkwardness makes me retreat.

If all of you would know, could know.

There are certain spheres I can no longer bear to be in. It's not easy to balance, and all I want to do is leave it behind and move on.

//Tuesday, August 24, 2010 10:34 PM

Y'know how we always say by grace through faith, and we put that invisible comma behind the word grace. But I've realised that the verse actually reads

"For it is by grace you have been saved through faith." (ESV)

Now read that in one breath, what naturally links? For it is by grace - you have been saved through faith. Something like that eh?

Saved through faith, yes, but only by grace.

That a Gentile like me, like us, could be saved.

On another note, this is crazy, but it's the last week of formal lessons, EVER, in RGS.

I remember in Sec2 I blogged a whole list of lasts. But this is really the last of the last. It's marking the beginning of the last chapter. There's still so many things, but at the same time, so few.

//Sunday, August 22, 2010 3:47 PM

Musings.

The innocence of a child, captured in the melody that so enraptures. He looks at me wide-eyed, mouth agape, filling in the words here and there. As I play, the notes ring, and we sing. A normal song we always sing, but this time with such a beautiful quality to it. He sits there, and we sing. How great is our God; the words ring true on both of our lips.

It's beautiful when a child sings.

笑在嘴上，甜在心上。

A delicious smile that spreads out slowly. A sweet joy, unabashed happiness.

Eyes lit up

Like fiery stars in the heavens.

//Friday, August 20, 2010 9:57 PM

³Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ,

Ephesians 1:3

Every spiritual blessing. The gravity of this is just too incomprehensible. And yet He has. He has given all of these freely unto me, and thought it good and wise, to save me, to save us.

PS. Food trail + flea market + post FAM hotel stay + city tour plans all sound very exciting :D Come soon!

//Monday, August 16, 2010 4:04 PM

You know what? Maybe i'm just not cut out to be a people person. Maybe i should just stop trying altogether.
It's a sharp disappointment in myself. And it stings. Because some times no matter how hard i try, i simply can't bring myself to it; even by sheer force of the will. It's one thing to know what to do, it's another to actually be able to have the strength to carry it out.

When I am weak, Oh Lord then You are strong.

// 3:21 PM

Enough with HBL. We don't even do this much work in school. Bah.

The geog game is really very fun. And addictive not to mention hahaha. My family keeps dying.

http://www.unicef.org/voy/explore/rights/explore_3142.html

Awesome man. We should do more things like these :D

That's all. Exams are in 2 weeks. It's crazy

//Thursday, August 05, 2010 6:18 PM

I will speak in terms of the bass, because that was what I was focusing on yesterday. I finally realised (though maybe not fully yet) what it means to listen to music. To listen to the parts coming together as a whole, and its beauty, no matter what genre. And I realise that beauty always reflects God, hence the revelation.

Like how the bass line acts as the "control", the adhesive, and the foundation upon which the other instruments/notes build upon. It remains steady and constant even through the smatter of sound.

Strong, convicted, unfaltering.

Although it might always be noticed, might not even be known, it's presence is vital, and once gone, is unmistakeable. It seeps into the subconscious. Very tangibly, undeniably, and tangibly, there.

Most of all, it completes the song, adds a sense of wholeness and roundness to it, gives it its feel, its groove, its worth.

(Of course, all instruments play together to achieve a desired effect. But for now I'm just focusing on the bass)

And really, doesn't that reflect my God?

He is my constant, my rock, my completion, my worth. Though I cannot see Him/feel Him sometimes, I know that He is most definitely there, for He will never leave me nor forsake me.

There is no changing Oh God with Thee.

He rides with me, through the high peaks, and the lowest hells, and sometimes He quietens my soul, with His majesty and power.

In His song, of which all nature sings, He has called me to join. And in so doing, He completes me, rounds me, crafts me into an object of beauty.

May I sing, ever only for my King.

Truly, if we do not praise, if we do not worship. Surely the stones will cry out, and the heaven declare His name day after day, and night after night they pour forth speech.

You are so beautiful Lord. There is no beauty without You, for You, are essentially beauty in itself. And beauty is too of You.

// 4:11 PM

I need to sleep. I was just thinking about my listening to music experience yesterday, and what I realised from it was really amazing. More on that later. Gotta get back to lit. Sigh.